Trailer Trash Doll

$19.95 plus shipping

Conceived in a gas station bathroom, and born in the back of a station wagon in the Bowlarama parking lot on league night. This little honey was raised on the four basic food groups (meatwiches, oleo, government cheese, and beer).
Possessed of an I.Q. that makes her ancestors proud, she is the first of her family to make it through the third grade. She would have finished the fourth if she had not made the mature decision to stay home with her first born son.
Also a model working Mom, even after a hard day gathering carts at the Honk & Holler, she still finds time to carve and fry the Christmas Bologna.

Drag Queen Dolls

$19.95 each plus shipping

He'll be the best girlfriend you ever had. You can hit the thrift stores and buy up every sequin in sight. Then after a few minutes with a glue gun and a sewing machine, and a few hours putting on make-up, you’ll be ready to hit the town.

Go down to the local piano bar and get ready to sing torch songs. You’ll always be turning heads, and after four or five martinis you’ll be lapping up the attention, like a glass of water in the desert. Just remember, never light your own cigarette, and the higher the hair the closer to God!

ARSENIC & APPLE PIE
40 De Burgh Drive
San Anselmo, Ca. 94960
(415) 459-1212 Phone, (415) 257-8819 Fax
customerservice@trailertrashdoll.com

Last revised: 14/08/01